did you get engaged???
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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