Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize