Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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