found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
