Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
