Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
