Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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