benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
