'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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