oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Small penises have feelings too.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize