why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
