pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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