Christians are straight up FREAKS
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
