saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
