...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
