Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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