I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
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Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
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cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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