i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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