and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
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Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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