Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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