After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
