Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize