You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
