I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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