her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Never underestimate the power of titties
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