he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
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Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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