If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
