The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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