New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
