Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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