bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
This is the high leading the old right now
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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