As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
