Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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