I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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