As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
