Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
so much tequila, so little girl.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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