its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
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