This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize