I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
