Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
