How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
