just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize