He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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