when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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