i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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