I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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