I want to stick my p in your. b.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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