I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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