I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
