He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
